Written in the tones of a discarded lover ~ one that’s shamelessly simply wanted to be of use..
In the cold, dark air,
I shivered under the street light’s glare.
Completely in despair,
I stood there, my feet bare.
And as I stood surrounded by snow,
I breathed in the air of emptiness.
As I stood there, I wondered how did I know
that this was how it felt to be engulfed in loneliness.
Despite the gem I had unearth,
I still meant nothing.
For the gem wasn’t mine to use for it’s worth –
it just chose me to do its bidding.
I had long guessed that happiness wasn’t meant for me,
but still, I had yearned for it.
My silly heart, how foolish was thee,
to hold onto what you had dreamed for an eternity.
What a fool I had been,
assuming everything was fine and dandy.
And now, my eyes have finally seen,
my total and complete stupidity.
And yet, I fight to prove my worth,
to soldier on to victory.
And defeat had so easily knocked my breath,
and left me lying, bleeding profusely.
My never ending journey to find love and glory,
might have ended – or had it just began?
I’m unsure, knowing only that I’m in agony,
with all my plans had ended in vain.
So I seek now to end my bitter streak,
perhaps I’m destined to forever lose.
The search for love and triumph left me weak,
and so I succumb to the pressure of the noose.
The rare gem I’ve unearthed,
somehow still belongs to me.
But it no longer feels like mine to be held,
and so I hold it loose in my palms, carefully.
Time will come for me,
and time will take the gem away as well.
With or without the gem, I’m the same,
but it’ll still hurt me to say farewell.
When I found it, I also found hope.
A sweet taste, a cool feeling.
But now when it’s time to say goodbye,
I wonder if without it, I’ll stop hoping.
Belief, that’s what you gave to me,
a belief that I could be someone.
You gave me something equally precious – hope,
even though it was a temporary instance.
You’ll live within me always,
come rain or shine.
You’ll be at the center of my inspirations,
the origin of my fun, the being of my mind.
Before I end, I wanna say I love you,
it was an honour to be of service to you.
Life would not be the same now that you’re no longer mine,
as usually, I’ll toughen up and pretend things are fine.
Hope you’ll remember me and who I was,
for I’ll no longer be the same person like before.
I’ll now return to my life and live in a mess,
as that was how I lived before you came ashore.